There are times when you just scratch your head wondering what the hell happened. This usually happens when I try cooking something way above my skill level and the entire fire department arrives, or I try driving what I see as a shortcut only to find I added 50 miles and two hours to the trip. In the case of movies, I feel this about Superman 3.
When you start with a spectacular film about one of the greatest DC superheroes, then have an even more awesome sequel that spawned an alternate (actually ORIGINAL) version 25 years later, you'd think that the third one would be just as, if not more, AWESOME!
Don't get me wrong, there are some great elements in Superman 3. Specifically, Christopher Reeve himself was the jewel as he got to play a good AND bad Superman. The battle between the 2 in a junkyard is spectacular. Add to that a revisit to Clark's high school and a reunion with his first crush Lana Lang is a refreshing change from the Lois Lane story, which had run its course by the end of 2. So...what the hell happened?
The culprit is Richard Pryor, who makes the whole movie his. And don't mistake me for disliking him, for Pryor was a gifted performer who made a lot of funny and a couple of dramatic films as well, I admire the man. That being said, this was not one of his highlights.
I can't blame it all on Pryor, however. The backstory of the film had a totally different villain making it more sci fi than action, along with more Kryptonian family revealed. That apparently fell through. Then there is the director Richard Lester who brought us Beatles and Musketeers movies in the 60s and 70s. He has turned the Superman franchise into a bit of slapstick comedy. The opening foretells this.
The first 2 films had grand openings with John Williams music playing over cast and credits. This movie begins with Pryor's character Gus Gorman being rejected at the unemployment office, followed by a lot of Murphy's Law street scenes of Metropolis as the credits roll upward. The music is also quite uninspired here and way too lighthearted for a movie's beginning.
We then see Gorman learning computers at his new job and geing quite talented at 80s-style coding. He is disgruntled at his paycheck deductions and uses his coding skills to get himself a bigger paycheck (a plot tool used later in "Office Space"). The boss Ross Webster discovers this through Gus's extravagant showing off of his wealth. Webster blackmails him into using the computer skills for Webster's own gain, such as ruining Colombia's coffee crop (which Superman thwarts)and the world's oil supply.
Meanwhile, Clark Kent goes to his high school reunion with Jimmy Olsen via bus. Clark sees what a dull bastard Jimmy is and creates a chemical plant fire to main Jimmy...just kidding, there is a chemical plant fire where Jimmy is hurt while taking pictures. Clark then goes on to his reunion and sees that a lot of people never change....which reflects real life quite well. He does, however, have a warm reunion with Lana Lang, one of those girls who realizes what she could have had if she didn't conform to social norms of the 60s....if she only knew!
Ross Webster is furious at his Colombia failure and has Gus create Kryptonite to kill Superman. However, Gus realizes there is an unknown element and puts tar in it. When Superman is presented with it during a civic welcoming ceremony, he soon becomes not dead but rather selfish, and soon embarks on destructive activities, even helping Webster by sabotaging an oil tanker.
Superman is also feeling guilty and self-loathing at this point, and after getting drunk and hearing a rah rah speech from Lana Lang's kid, his soul breaks him in 2, the good Clark and the evil Superman, and a great fight ensues in a junkyard. While evil Superman seems to dominate the fight, Clark keeps getting up for more. This angers and fatigues the bad Superman and at the end Clark strangles him easily, making him disappear. The real Superman is back and goes about undoing his oil damage.
He is then lured to the Grand Canyon where Webster has built Gus's mega-computer in a cave. Gus, Ross, his sister Vera, and girlfriend Lorelei are already there and firing missiles at Superman, one of which knocks him out for a bit. When he enters the cave, Vera fires real Kryptonite rays at him (how they got it right is not explained). Gus realizes how wrong this has become and starts damaging his own computer. However, the computer has taken on a life of its own and turns on its operators, gathering power forn the nation to feed itself. Superman grabs some acid (no you stoner, I mean from the rescued chemical plant!) and uses it to Trojan Horse the computer, destroying it and causing much damage that we can't quite figure out why the Department of the Interior doesn't get pissed.
From there, Superman spares Gus from the authorities since Gus tried to save him while Ross and his ladies are assumedly taken to justice. He then goes to see (as Clark) Lana and her son, recently transplanted to Metropolis and they share a moment as he replaces her diamind ring she had to pawn to pay bills (aww). At the end, she is Perry White's new secretary.
Now, I know I oversimplified the story, ignoring a lot of little stuff, but the little stuff didn't help. Lois Lane has maybe 5 minutes of screen time and the Daily Planet itself is like scenes at MI6 in James Bond films only less classy. Way too many Richard Pryor moments of frightened vocal sounds ("In Living Color" had a great sketch of this mannerism in its first season) make you think you're watching deleted scenes from "Stir Crazy". There are some "tender" scenes with Lana Lang and her son. Nothing wrong with those, since Annette O'Toole was well-cast. Another element is Brad, the high school football player whose glory days have been replaced with booze and he can't udnerstand why Lana wants no part of him but prefers "nice" Clark.
I actually do like this movie. If you watch a syndicated version, the opening credits are right at the start and show space and play the real Superman theme, while Gus's unemployment office scene and the street comedy come after (if you cut the street scenes, the movie gels a bit better). The theme about technology taking over (mirrored in the same year's "Wargames") is just as prevalent today. The comedy (or rather ATTEMPTED comedy) was what tore the film apart at times.
Next up: another Bond flick.
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