I was recently checking Yahoo! headlines, hoping for some nice gossipy tidbit about Ms. Lohan, a new celebrity death, or a food research breakthrough....and got what was possibly the best idea I've read in some time. There were a few thousand people petitioning the White House to approve the construction of a Death Star.
Ok, ok, I know what you are all thinking: THIS IS A GREAT IDEA! Of course it is, just thinkof the economic boom to the country. Lots of jobs would be created, and as a result, more money would be pumped back into the economy. A project of this magnitude could really unite this country. It would finally bring patriotism back just like World War 2 and...oh, who am I kidding? The Empire had what it needed, we don't. Let's break this down:
The Empire taxed and terrorized any planet it wanted at any time. They had all the money AND the materials, and all they needed was a Sith choke hold or burst of lightning to convince their minions to fork over the goods. The Emperor just had to make his wishes known and his will was done....I suspect the Imperial chefs were pretty nervous whenever he got hungry.
OK, let's see what we have....nothing. Really. The congressional bickering over every tiny detail of construction would last forever. Would our taxes be raised? Oh no, those Bush-era tax cuts are now forever, apparently. So, revenue is not a guarantee. Obama has no Force choke hold, lightning, or even mind trick to enforce his bidding....if he utilized Bill Clinton for the mind trick, maybe, just maybe.
All right, let's move to labor: the Empire got everything built pretty quickly and efficiently....well, almost. Toward the end with the first Death Star, they were in such a hurry to finish that they forgot to connect the exhaust port to the ventilation system as opposed to the reactor! Naturally, this voided any homeowner's policy. And of course the second Death Star was REALLY rushed because they left an opening to fit several fighter ships in! All they needed then was Mike Holmes to "make it right", not that the construction crew were Canadian.
Anyway, Imperial labor was efficient, and I suspect their payment was the privelege to live a bit more. They had Vader saying, "Perhaps I can find new ways to motivate them!" to threaten the few slackers.
Let's look at the highly-motivated U.S. labor force....excuse me while I laugh as I look at a photo of a Ford Pinto! How much will people really want to work on this "project"? It will be a boon to the many temp agencies, I'm sure! The medical benefits will be nill, I'm sure, so that motivation is out. I mentioned the Pinto because, well, if the United Auto Workers were in charge of the Death Star's construction, the elevator to the command tower would never work, the massive planet-vaporizing gun would backfire....and I suspect the cell towers on it would get bad to no reception. The order to destroy an oncoming enemy ship would never be heard!
Finally, let's look at the space aspect. The Empire had star destroyers, TIE fighters, shuttles, pretty stellar-oriented organization, actually. And they had no trouble sacrificing their own in the name of the Emperor.
OK, let's look at our space savvy. Now, back in the 1960s, this was possible. We WANTED to conquer the universe, but the farthest we got was the moon. After that, we just sent satellites, probes, Hubbles, and shuttles for the next few decades. I sense that the 1986 Challenger debacle killed the spirit. We as Americans don't like it when people from our country die, so it was determined, apparently, that there'd be no further risk to American lives fro space reasons. This doesn't meet with Imperial casualness toward its work forces. They have CLONES with the same brain. Yes, I know, we can think of congress in that way, but I don't want to think of them trying to fly a star destroyer!
So, I think a Death Star is not in our lifetime. The money isn't there, our labor force isn't properly motivated for quality work, and our astronauts get shaky once out of orbit. And...wait...I gotta go, the Emperor wants a BLT!
Tuesday, January 29, 2013
Saturday, January 5, 2013
Another great trip!
OK, it has been a while since I've posted about a great road trip so here we go. Today's adventure is......car revs instead of drum rolls.....LAS VEGAS TO SALT LAKE CITY!
Huh? I hear a confused rumble in the crowd, mixed with groans of despair. After all, this sounds like a big desert drive, right? Well, some of it is...the biggest desert drive, actually, was the drive to Reno in November....there was 450 miles of it! This drive, however is absolutely BEAUTIFUL...most of it.
The boring desert part is actually right in the beginning. From Las Vegas to the first 10 miles in Arizona, it is scrub, brown, and needing of good music. It can be nice, I suppose, in early morning or at sundown. After over 10 years, however, I am sick of the Nevada desert.
Interstate 15 at least raises the speed limit to 75 once it leaves Las Vegas. We go up a long rise out of the Vegas Valley and then meet the northern end of Las Vegas Blvd. Soon after, U.S. 93 breaks off to head into deeper desert (I've taken it, it is truly desert all the way up to Idaho!), 15 moves to give access to the beautiful Valley of Fire, more desert, then access to Glendale and Logandale. Then comes a 20 mile stretch of straight flat freeway! This is the part I hate the most. Once that's done, we go down a long steep grade and then enter Mesquite, a state border town with a lot of golf courses and spas. I like this town a lot, actually, not to live in, but because it foretells of change.
15 then enters Arizona. The first 10 miles are just desert, but then we enter the gorgeous gorge...really! 15 winds through a huge narrow canyon made by the Virgin River. It's almost 20 miles of pure bliss, and when we emerge from it, the Utah line is straight ahead. What makes it so special is that the scenery has drastically changed. Ahead are red-rock cliffs and mesas...I believe Zion Canyon is behind one of them. From there, 15 enters St. George, a favorite town to stop and eat. I recommend Cracker Barrel, but NOT Chuck-a-Rama! There used to be a Shoney's here, but no more.
From there, 15 begins a fairly steep climb in a short time through some mountains and before we know it, we're entering Cedar City, a sprawling small town that is much cooler in temperature than St. George. 15 sort of goes back into the desert, but there is green growth in this one and it goes by fast. There is even an 80mph stretch in rural Utah! Before long, we go through Beaver and then a little after that is the turnoff for I-70. If we go to Colorado, we turn off here, and that drive has its own treasures, including a 110-mile stretch with scenery but no gas,food, or other touch-ups.
From here, 15 begins a long pattern of summit rises and long valleys between them. These valleys tend to have small towns with services, like Filllmore, Holden, Scipio, and Nephi. Nephi is a favorite gas stop for us. Soon after Nephi, we hit Santaquin, the first town in a long line of towns in the Salt Lake area. This string goes almost all the way to Idaho, in fact! We go through Spanish Fork, Orem, Provo, American Frok, and Lehi. We then go over a ridge to see the sprawling Sal Lake City metro area! It's quite a sight. We don't actually go all the way to Salt Lake, we head into Midvale, just south of the city limits, so we can see Vickie's dad. One day we will head to Clearfield near Ogden (30 miles further up 15) to see her Uncle Bob and Aunt Mary.
The trip back is good as well, with the Nevada desert as the LAST part. We are never really happy to come back, since Utah has given us rain, snow, a lack of slots in every store, and just plain good times. It has also given Vickie access to her father after many years, and that is what makes it so special.
Huh? I hear a confused rumble in the crowd, mixed with groans of despair. After all, this sounds like a big desert drive, right? Well, some of it is...the biggest desert drive, actually, was the drive to Reno in November....there was 450 miles of it! This drive, however is absolutely BEAUTIFUL...most of it.
The boring desert part is actually right in the beginning. From Las Vegas to the first 10 miles in Arizona, it is scrub, brown, and needing of good music. It can be nice, I suppose, in early morning or at sundown. After over 10 years, however, I am sick of the Nevada desert.
Interstate 15 at least raises the speed limit to 75 once it leaves Las Vegas. We go up a long rise out of the Vegas Valley and then meet the northern end of Las Vegas Blvd. Soon after, U.S. 93 breaks off to head into deeper desert (I've taken it, it is truly desert all the way up to Idaho!), 15 moves to give access to the beautiful Valley of Fire, more desert, then access to Glendale and Logandale. Then comes a 20 mile stretch of straight flat freeway! This is the part I hate the most. Once that's done, we go down a long steep grade and then enter Mesquite, a state border town with a lot of golf courses and spas. I like this town a lot, actually, not to live in, but because it foretells of change.
15 then enters Arizona. The first 10 miles are just desert, but then we enter the gorgeous gorge...really! 15 winds through a huge narrow canyon made by the Virgin River. It's almost 20 miles of pure bliss, and when we emerge from it, the Utah line is straight ahead. What makes it so special is that the scenery has drastically changed. Ahead are red-rock cliffs and mesas...I believe Zion Canyon is behind one of them. From there, 15 enters St. George, a favorite town to stop and eat. I recommend Cracker Barrel, but NOT Chuck-a-Rama! There used to be a Shoney's here, but no more.
From there, 15 begins a fairly steep climb in a short time through some mountains and before we know it, we're entering Cedar City, a sprawling small town that is much cooler in temperature than St. George. 15 sort of goes back into the desert, but there is green growth in this one and it goes by fast. There is even an 80mph stretch in rural Utah! Before long, we go through Beaver and then a little after that is the turnoff for I-70. If we go to Colorado, we turn off here, and that drive has its own treasures, including a 110-mile stretch with scenery but no gas,food, or other touch-ups.
From here, 15 begins a long pattern of summit rises and long valleys between them. These valleys tend to have small towns with services, like Filllmore, Holden, Scipio, and Nephi. Nephi is a favorite gas stop for us. Soon after Nephi, we hit Santaquin, the first town in a long line of towns in the Salt Lake area. This string goes almost all the way to Idaho, in fact! We go through Spanish Fork, Orem, Provo, American Frok, and Lehi. We then go over a ridge to see the sprawling Sal Lake City metro area! It's quite a sight. We don't actually go all the way to Salt Lake, we head into Midvale, just south of the city limits, so we can see Vickie's dad. One day we will head to Clearfield near Ogden (30 miles further up 15) to see her Uncle Bob and Aunt Mary.
The trip back is good as well, with the Nevada desert as the LAST part. We are never really happy to come back, since Utah has given us rain, snow, a lack of slots in every store, and just plain good times. It has also given Vickie access to her father after many years, and that is what makes it so special.
Monday, December 31, 2012
2012- me and death
Well, armageddon did not happen...at least not this year. The Mayans either made a mistake...or someone just wanted to generate hype. Gee, which could it be? Hmm... When I think of that whole Mayan calendar doomsday thing, I am reminded of the movie "Mars Attacks", where there is a character played by Remington Steele who convices Jack Nicholson (who somehow got into the White House) to be friendly to the Martians. This character has no background with aliens, he just speaks with a British accent and smokes a pipe, which, as we all know, makes any twerp an expert to the average American eye, especially in a documentary.
Apart from that, on a personal level, 2012 was an ok year. Yes, just ok. However, it was worlds better than 2011, which ranks among my worst years (2001, 2005, and 2010 qualify in that aspect). Now, when I qualify these rankings, I am referring to my professional life in the American public elementary school. It has been a rollercoaster ride for about 3 years now, since I have worked at 3 schools in that time. I am happy to say that things seem to be finally settling down. I will cross my fingers, though.
At home, things are going really well. I have been with Vickie for almost 7 years now come February. She and I have loved watching our little Natalie grow for 3 1/2 years now. She is our treasure in life, no 2 ways about it!
Writing-wise, things have been, well, ssssllllloooooowwwwwwww. I have spent much time trying to be a good 2nd grade teacher curriculum and style-wise that my writing time and endurance have gone down. I hope 2013 proves to be more prolific.
Okay, enough about little ol-40 years old me, let's get to death. Every year, we lose a good number of celebrities that we assumed would live forever. Let's look at some highlights.
Charles Durning- recent Christmas day death, actually. I will always remember him playing a stubborn cop in a few movies, as well as a lovable old guy on "Evening Shade". He will be missed.
Jack Klugman- TV's Oscar Madison and medical examiner Quincy. Rest in Peace!
Larry Hagman- seriously, I am split as to whether I think of him more as Major Nelson or J.R. Ewing. He was talented in both roles.
Alex Karras- Mongo, that's what I'll always see Karras as. I know he did a lot of other stuff, but I really don't care about his asshole sheriff in Porky's or kind dad in "Webster".
Andy Williams- not everyone's favorite singer (who is?), but "It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year" is a regular staple of our Christmas song lineup.
Neil Armstrong- 1969 made this man famous world-wide, and I like to think that he was what all aspiring astronauts wanted to be, the first person to officially step in new territory.
Phyllis Diller- the cackle and the wild hair will be watching over us forever after 95 years. That's a good life!
Ron Palillo and Robert Hegyes- Horshack and Epstein, respectively. The nose and the laugh.... and notes from Epstein's mother. Nuff said.
Marvin Hamlisch- great movie pianist!
Sherman Hemsley- At last, he has joined Weezie in Heaven! Like Carroll O'Connor, he hit fame at a time that will probably never come again. Reruns will keep Mr. Jefferson alive forever.
Sally Ride- She was probably what all aspiring female astronauts wanted to be, and that's ok. RIP!
Rodney King- Unfortunately, he is more remembered as a cause to a bigger, tragic event and not as a person in his own right. He was savagely beaten over 20 years ago, and died at the bottom of a pool this year. A tragic life where something tragic might have turned positive for him in the future. FOr it, it seems, it did not.
Ray Bradbury- great sci-fi writer! RIP!
Richard Dawson- Once again, is he more famous for playing British POW Newkirk or for kissing contestants on "Family Feud"? Either way, we have lost a great talent.
Robin Gibb- Another BeeGee gone, and now we just have Barry. Sad really, these talented Gibbs have left far too early.
Donna Summer- talented singer whose disco hits are cherished, mostly by late 70s enthusiasts. Digital 70s radiuo stations will keep her spirit alive, and I do believe she worked hard for her money.
Maurice Sendak- beloved children's author and illustrator. I hope his stories remain a staple of libraries and schools forever!
George Lindsey- Goober is gone, but so is a good character actor on many shows as well as a lovable coot on Hee Haw. RIP!
Junior Seau- Now, football has never been my passion, but having lived in San Diego for a short time, he was visible to me in the early 90s. His age and cause of death would lead me to think (without knowing ALL the facts mind you) he didn't feel he had a good life after the football career ended. Whatever it was, though, he was (and hopefully still is) a beloved San Diego figure.
Dick Clark- If there was a word for him while I was growing up, it was VISIBLE. He was on game shows both as a panelist and host, he did "Bandstand", as well as various TV specials and commercials. Above all, he seemed ageless. New Year's will never be the same. Vicious postscript: Ryan Seacrest, you will never replace this man, you don't have the charisma.
Jonathan Frid- Barnabas Collins will forever lie in his coffin. If you've never seen a Dark Shadows episode from 1967 onward, you are probably saying, who?
Mike Wallace- hard-hitting jounralist. 60 Minutes has large shoes to fill.
Davy Jones- Monkees singer (and not the one with a locker). RIP!
Whitney Houston- great singer who succumbed to bad marriage and drugs (one I suspect greatly influenced the other). I prefer to remember her in the 80s before the drama began.
Ben Gazzara- a great tough-guy actor! RIP!
Don Cornelius- the don of Soul Train and R&B. That deep voice, need I go on?. RIP!
Joe Paterno- He WAS Penn State football, I don't care about the controversy that surrounded him when he died. I wasn't a Penn State fan, but I respected his work.
Bob Anderson- who? Ah yes, he created the lightsaber duel style in the original Star Wars trilogy, and the duel scenes to me are the best parts of all the movies (and since Attack of the Clones's duel was so lame, that should say enough about the whole movie)
Looking at that long list, I can't imagine who else could go next year. All in all, I hope everyone goes into 2013 with a positive attitude. Tough, I know, with the political and economic climate so bleak. However, what else can we go into the new year with? A bleak outlook could make the whole year terrible, and that's not what life is all about.
Happy New Year everybody!
Apart from that, on a personal level, 2012 was an ok year. Yes, just ok. However, it was worlds better than 2011, which ranks among my worst years (2001, 2005, and 2010 qualify in that aspect). Now, when I qualify these rankings, I am referring to my professional life in the American public elementary school. It has been a rollercoaster ride for about 3 years now, since I have worked at 3 schools in that time. I am happy to say that things seem to be finally settling down. I will cross my fingers, though.
At home, things are going really well. I have been with Vickie for almost 7 years now come February. She and I have loved watching our little Natalie grow for 3 1/2 years now. She is our treasure in life, no 2 ways about it!
Writing-wise, things have been, well, ssssllllloooooowwwwwwww. I have spent much time trying to be a good 2nd grade teacher curriculum and style-wise that my writing time and endurance have gone down. I hope 2013 proves to be more prolific.
Okay, enough about little ol-40 years old me, let's get to death. Every year, we lose a good number of celebrities that we assumed would live forever. Let's look at some highlights.
Charles Durning- recent Christmas day death, actually. I will always remember him playing a stubborn cop in a few movies, as well as a lovable old guy on "Evening Shade". He will be missed.
Jack Klugman- TV's Oscar Madison and medical examiner Quincy. Rest in Peace!
Larry Hagman- seriously, I am split as to whether I think of him more as Major Nelson or J.R. Ewing. He was talented in both roles.
Alex Karras- Mongo, that's what I'll always see Karras as. I know he did a lot of other stuff, but I really don't care about his asshole sheriff in Porky's or kind dad in "Webster".
Andy Williams- not everyone's favorite singer (who is?), but "It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year" is a regular staple of our Christmas song lineup.
Neil Armstrong- 1969 made this man famous world-wide, and I like to think that he was what all aspiring astronauts wanted to be, the first person to officially step in new territory.
Phyllis Diller- the cackle and the wild hair will be watching over us forever after 95 years. That's a good life!
Ron Palillo and Robert Hegyes- Horshack and Epstein, respectively. The nose and the laugh.... and notes from Epstein's mother. Nuff said.
Marvin Hamlisch- great movie pianist!
Sherman Hemsley- At last, he has joined Weezie in Heaven! Like Carroll O'Connor, he hit fame at a time that will probably never come again. Reruns will keep Mr. Jefferson alive forever.
Sally Ride- She was probably what all aspiring female astronauts wanted to be, and that's ok. RIP!
Rodney King- Unfortunately, he is more remembered as a cause to a bigger, tragic event and not as a person in his own right. He was savagely beaten over 20 years ago, and died at the bottom of a pool this year. A tragic life where something tragic might have turned positive for him in the future. FOr it, it seems, it did not.
Ray Bradbury- great sci-fi writer! RIP!
Richard Dawson- Once again, is he more famous for playing British POW Newkirk or for kissing contestants on "Family Feud"? Either way, we have lost a great talent.
Robin Gibb- Another BeeGee gone, and now we just have Barry. Sad really, these talented Gibbs have left far too early.
Donna Summer- talented singer whose disco hits are cherished, mostly by late 70s enthusiasts. Digital 70s radiuo stations will keep her spirit alive, and I do believe she worked hard for her money.
Maurice Sendak- beloved children's author and illustrator. I hope his stories remain a staple of libraries and schools forever!
George Lindsey- Goober is gone, but so is a good character actor on many shows as well as a lovable coot on Hee Haw. RIP!
Junior Seau- Now, football has never been my passion, but having lived in San Diego for a short time, he was visible to me in the early 90s. His age and cause of death would lead me to think (without knowing ALL the facts mind you) he didn't feel he had a good life after the football career ended. Whatever it was, though, he was (and hopefully still is) a beloved San Diego figure.
Dick Clark- If there was a word for him while I was growing up, it was VISIBLE. He was on game shows both as a panelist and host, he did "Bandstand", as well as various TV specials and commercials. Above all, he seemed ageless. New Year's will never be the same. Vicious postscript: Ryan Seacrest, you will never replace this man, you don't have the charisma.
Jonathan Frid- Barnabas Collins will forever lie in his coffin. If you've never seen a Dark Shadows episode from 1967 onward, you are probably saying, who?
Mike Wallace- hard-hitting jounralist. 60 Minutes has large shoes to fill.
Davy Jones- Monkees singer (and not the one with a locker). RIP!
Whitney Houston- great singer who succumbed to bad marriage and drugs (one I suspect greatly influenced the other). I prefer to remember her in the 80s before the drama began.
Ben Gazzara- a great tough-guy actor! RIP!
Don Cornelius- the don of Soul Train and R&B. That deep voice, need I go on?. RIP!
Joe Paterno- He WAS Penn State football, I don't care about the controversy that surrounded him when he died. I wasn't a Penn State fan, but I respected his work.
Bob Anderson- who? Ah yes, he created the lightsaber duel style in the original Star Wars trilogy, and the duel scenes to me are the best parts of all the movies (and since Attack of the Clones's duel was so lame, that should say enough about the whole movie)
Looking at that long list, I can't imagine who else could go next year. All in all, I hope everyone goes into 2013 with a positive attitude. Tough, I know, with the political and economic climate so bleak. However, what else can we go into the new year with? A bleak outlook could make the whole year terrible, and that's not what life is all about.
Happy New Year everybody!
Monday, November 12, 2012
Desert, anyone?
Having lived in southern Nevada for a while now, I would guess that a lot of people I know/knew in Pennsylvania don't really get what desert driving is like, especially on a long drive. It does take planning. Unlike Pennsylvania (and I guess California to a good extent), where you can gas up and get food every few miles, Nevada is a different story.
There was a movement about 20 years ago to boost tourism in Nevada, labeling U.S. 50 as the "Loneliest Road in America", and it was for good reason. U.S. 50 is not heavily traveled, since it does not connect any major cities in the majority of its trek across the barren desert. It does hit Carson City and southern Lake Tahoe, but those areas also have nearby connections to bigger roads like U.S. 395 and Interstate 80 (which IS heavily traveled). 50's last major town heading east is Fallon (not far from 80) before it goes into the barren landscape of valleys and mountain summits in Nevada and Utah. Well, U.S. 95 is similar, although it does provide the ONLY direct route between Las Vegas and Reno.
My wife and I like cooler temperatures in the fall and winter. It's how we grew up, and a cold winter, in my opinion, wakes up the soul a bit. Other people in Las Vegas do not feel that way. People who were born in Vegas cannot imagine living anywhere else (we can all dig that home spirit, can't we?) and people who moved here to escape any real winter ( like my mother-in-law) avoid any scrapes with winter unless Vegas is hit with it once in a blue moon. Well, not too long ago, Vickie and I took a road trip to Reno. One reason was a couple's getaway and the other was for a short foray into cooler climes.
Like I said, planning is essential, so we got road food and a gas fill-up in NW Vegas before escaping into the desert. It doesn't take long. After the turnoff for Mt. Charleston (many Vegasans' will go there for 15 minutes of real winter), U.S. 95 goes into the empty desert. A mileage sign after the mountain turnoff says it all: "Indian Springs: 26, Beatty: 99, Tonopah: 193". This is how desert driving is: you plan for a hundred miles at a time, then reassess your needs. Indian Springs isn't a real stop for anything but a quick snack if you didn't eat before...and the gas prices are atrocious there!
OK, back to the wilderness, not that Indian Springs was a respite. About 20 miles later, we enter the LARGEST county by land size in Nevada:Nye. Nye County is not only huge, but it plays into the national legend of Las Vegas and legalized prostitution. For the record, nowhere in Clark County (where Vegas is located) is prostitution legal. One must venture into Nye or another rural county to find that luxury. Spread out in Nye are a collection of brothels where one may shell out $200+ for a cheap thrill. Having never the eagerness or spare money for it, I'll leave it at that.
U.S. 95 turns into a 2-lane road shortly after entering Nye County, and will stay that way for most of our voyage. We pass by a junction for NV 160 which heads to Pahrump (brothel center), then 17 miles down the road is the Amargosa Valley oasis, providing a link to Death Valley, and good for gas at a decent rate, a diner, convenience store and the Bunny Ranch (all owned by the same guy). We don't stop yet, and continue to Beatty, which provides another junction to Death Valley. Beatty is also one of many 25mph speed traps on 95 (the first was Indian Springs). Moving along, we see more desert, encounter another access to Death Valley, and then enter Esmeralda County. It's nothing special, just another desert county. However, its county seat, which we pass through, is Goldfield (where we hit some snow flurries)...a fascinating collection of old buildings with a small population. We figure if someone wanted to truly restore this town to prior glory, tourism may build. However, since 95 is in the middle of nowhere at this point, it's an iffy proposition. Thirty miles later, we hit Tonopah (speed trap), 94 miles from Beatty, where we re-enter Nye County briefly. Here, we do our first pit stop, grab some snack food, then move on. Tonopah is like Goldfield, but with more business to support it, since 95 and U.S. 6 meet up here for a 41-mile fling.
Once Tonopah is past, we re-enter Esmeralda County where 6 and 95 are a series of long straightaways. The sunset is beautiful on this stretch with a small bit of sunlight hitting the many clouds with a kaleidoscope of pinks, purples, and reds. 95 turns north later and after a bit, enters Mineral County, even though we didn't feel quite fortified. Nighttime truly hits us here, and far down the road is Hawthorne (speed trap), roughly 100 miles from Tonopah. Here, we need to touch up on gas, and it comes at a cost. The cheapest was $3.93/gallon, and the most expensive was a Shell at $4.37/gallon. No major junctions here, that's why, just an Army depot. Moving on, we traverse Walker Lake, invisible to us in the dark.
After the lake-hugging is done, we hit a major junction for U.S. 95 Alt(ernate), which heads west to Yerington, then north to meet I-80 in Fernley. This is actually considered a link to Reno and Carson City, albeit a longer one, since it also provides access to U.S. 395 WAY down the road in the Sierras via other highways. We continue on 95 for 39 miles more, hitting Lyon County briefly, then Churchill County where we reach Fallon (about 70 miles from Hawthorne) and U.S. 50. We hit more snow flurries approaching Fallon, which in the dark makes it look like you're in hyperdrive in space (pretty cool if you think of it that way)! We take 50 west to Alt 50, taking us to Fernley and I-80, which we take for the last 33 miles to Reno, hitting industrial and older-looking Sparks on the way.
Let's review: we drove almost 450 miles hitting just a few towns: Beatty, Tonopah, Hawthorne, Fallon, Fernley, Sparks, Reno). If you live in the East, 450 miles could mean several states passing MANY towns. Even a turnpike would provide gas and food on an average of every 20-30 miles there. The desert is a land of planning to survive or get stranded a long ways from any people.
Coming back, we stopped at Jerry's cafe in Fallon for breakfast, a true locals' diner NOT IN A CASINO with decent food, something Vegas lacks. I decided I could live in a town like that...if I really want the desert, I can just go east a few miles. If I want to see the Sierras, they're a mere hour away, as is Lake Tahoe (superior in every way to Lake Mead). Also coming back, we saw Walker Lake, which is pretty in its remote setting. We stopped in Hawthorne again for gas, Tonopah for bathroom and coffee, and then in Amargosa Valley for a bite to eat at that diner next to a brothel.
The places we see and stop at have never ceased to amaze me. We're not a Denny's family if we can help it, we want to see the living and the beautiful...and sometimes they come together but not often. If you come to Nevada and really want to see the state, leave Vegas for a bit and head north. Otherwise, stay, spend your money, wear your goofy touristy t-shirt and oversized drink and go home. As for me, I'll take true desert life for a bit. I've lived in Vegas for over 10 years and it's easy to weary of the fakeness here. A slice of desert ala mode with coffee, please!
There was a movement about 20 years ago to boost tourism in Nevada, labeling U.S. 50 as the "Loneliest Road in America", and it was for good reason. U.S. 50 is not heavily traveled, since it does not connect any major cities in the majority of its trek across the barren desert. It does hit Carson City and southern Lake Tahoe, but those areas also have nearby connections to bigger roads like U.S. 395 and Interstate 80 (which IS heavily traveled). 50's last major town heading east is Fallon (not far from 80) before it goes into the barren landscape of valleys and mountain summits in Nevada and Utah. Well, U.S. 95 is similar, although it does provide the ONLY direct route between Las Vegas and Reno.
My wife and I like cooler temperatures in the fall and winter. It's how we grew up, and a cold winter, in my opinion, wakes up the soul a bit. Other people in Las Vegas do not feel that way. People who were born in Vegas cannot imagine living anywhere else (we can all dig that home spirit, can't we?) and people who moved here to escape any real winter ( like my mother-in-law) avoid any scrapes with winter unless Vegas is hit with it once in a blue moon. Well, not too long ago, Vickie and I took a road trip to Reno. One reason was a couple's getaway and the other was for a short foray into cooler climes.
Like I said, planning is essential, so we got road food and a gas fill-up in NW Vegas before escaping into the desert. It doesn't take long. After the turnoff for Mt. Charleston (many Vegasans' will go there for 15 minutes of real winter), U.S. 95 goes into the empty desert. A mileage sign after the mountain turnoff says it all: "Indian Springs: 26, Beatty: 99, Tonopah: 193". This is how desert driving is: you plan for a hundred miles at a time, then reassess your needs. Indian Springs isn't a real stop for anything but a quick snack if you didn't eat before...and the gas prices are atrocious there!
OK, back to the wilderness, not that Indian Springs was a respite. About 20 miles later, we enter the LARGEST county by land size in Nevada:Nye. Nye County is not only huge, but it plays into the national legend of Las Vegas and legalized prostitution. For the record, nowhere in Clark County (where Vegas is located) is prostitution legal. One must venture into Nye or another rural county to find that luxury. Spread out in Nye are a collection of brothels where one may shell out $200+ for a cheap thrill. Having never the eagerness or spare money for it, I'll leave it at that.
U.S. 95 turns into a 2-lane road shortly after entering Nye County, and will stay that way for most of our voyage. We pass by a junction for NV 160 which heads to Pahrump (brothel center), then 17 miles down the road is the Amargosa Valley oasis, providing a link to Death Valley, and good for gas at a decent rate, a diner, convenience store and the Bunny Ranch (all owned by the same guy). We don't stop yet, and continue to Beatty, which provides another junction to Death Valley. Beatty is also one of many 25mph speed traps on 95 (the first was Indian Springs). Moving along, we see more desert, encounter another access to Death Valley, and then enter Esmeralda County. It's nothing special, just another desert county. However, its county seat, which we pass through, is Goldfield (where we hit some snow flurries)...a fascinating collection of old buildings with a small population. We figure if someone wanted to truly restore this town to prior glory, tourism may build. However, since 95 is in the middle of nowhere at this point, it's an iffy proposition. Thirty miles later, we hit Tonopah (speed trap), 94 miles from Beatty, where we re-enter Nye County briefly. Here, we do our first pit stop, grab some snack food, then move on. Tonopah is like Goldfield, but with more business to support it, since 95 and U.S. 6 meet up here for a 41-mile fling.
Once Tonopah is past, we re-enter Esmeralda County where 6 and 95 are a series of long straightaways. The sunset is beautiful on this stretch with a small bit of sunlight hitting the many clouds with a kaleidoscope of pinks, purples, and reds. 95 turns north later and after a bit, enters Mineral County, even though we didn't feel quite fortified. Nighttime truly hits us here, and far down the road is Hawthorne (speed trap), roughly 100 miles from Tonopah. Here, we need to touch up on gas, and it comes at a cost. The cheapest was $3.93/gallon, and the most expensive was a Shell at $4.37/gallon. No major junctions here, that's why, just an Army depot. Moving on, we traverse Walker Lake, invisible to us in the dark.
After the lake-hugging is done, we hit a major junction for U.S. 95 Alt(ernate), which heads west to Yerington, then north to meet I-80 in Fernley. This is actually considered a link to Reno and Carson City, albeit a longer one, since it also provides access to U.S. 395 WAY down the road in the Sierras via other highways. We continue on 95 for 39 miles more, hitting Lyon County briefly, then Churchill County where we reach Fallon (about 70 miles from Hawthorne) and U.S. 50. We hit more snow flurries approaching Fallon, which in the dark makes it look like you're in hyperdrive in space (pretty cool if you think of it that way)! We take 50 west to Alt 50, taking us to Fernley and I-80, which we take for the last 33 miles to Reno, hitting industrial and older-looking Sparks on the way.
Let's review: we drove almost 450 miles hitting just a few towns: Beatty, Tonopah, Hawthorne, Fallon, Fernley, Sparks, Reno). If you live in the East, 450 miles could mean several states passing MANY towns. Even a turnpike would provide gas and food on an average of every 20-30 miles there. The desert is a land of planning to survive or get stranded a long ways from any people.
Coming back, we stopped at Jerry's cafe in Fallon for breakfast, a true locals' diner NOT IN A CASINO with decent food, something Vegas lacks. I decided I could live in a town like that...if I really want the desert, I can just go east a few miles. If I want to see the Sierras, they're a mere hour away, as is Lake Tahoe (superior in every way to Lake Mead). Also coming back, we saw Walker Lake, which is pretty in its remote setting. We stopped in Hawthorne again for gas, Tonopah for bathroom and coffee, and then in Amargosa Valley for a bite to eat at that diner next to a brothel.
The places we see and stop at have never ceased to amaze me. We're not a Denny's family if we can help it, we want to see the living and the beautiful...and sometimes they come together but not often. If you come to Nevada and really want to see the state, leave Vegas for a bit and head north. Otherwise, stay, spend your money, wear your goofy touristy t-shirt and oversized drink and go home. As for me, I'll take true desert life for a bit. I've lived in Vegas for over 10 years and it's easy to weary of the fakeness here. A slice of desert ala mode with coffee, please!
Monday, November 5, 2012
The dark side...or a hemmerhoidal werewolf?
Again we enter the climax of another election season. And, yet again, I stay entirely apolitical about it. I have to. There's no way I can take sides in it...partially because I have no belief in either of them and partially because, well, I DON'T KNOW EXACTLY WHAT THEY STAND FOR!
Let's think back to 1984...the last election I vividly remember (well, I vaguely remember 1980, but all I remember is Reagan delivering a beating most men couldn't withstand, and Carter withstood nothing). No, 1984 was easy: Reagan stood for Republican American commie-fighting goodness while Mondale stood for evil taxation...and Reagan delivered another solid beating.
1988: Reagan's quiet veep vs. a tank-riding weenie. I think we all foresaw 4 great years of Saturday Night Live with Dana Carvey as Bush...nuff said.
1992: Bush vs. Clinton vs (at times) Perot. Frankly, I was prepared to vote for Perot until he dropped out unexpectedly. Carvey was leaving SNL soon, and by 1992 the comedy was long over.
1996: Clinton vs. well, a major Republican jackhole. Clinton was doing well, it was a solid decision.
2000: I'm still troubled by this one. I feel that we'd be in a different place if Gore (who I voted for) had been declared winner. It'd be nice to imagine no 9/11, but that's no certainty It'd be nice to imagine the economic prosperity would have continued a bit longer. OK...I'll move on before sounding too much like John Lennon.
2004: OK, I'll admit it, I voted for Kerry, and that may have been a mistake. I just knew I didn't want 4 more years of Cliff Barnes in office, but that's what we got anyway. I thinik this is when I felt things were murky: evil or a lesser evil. I thought I chose a lesser evil and I'm not sure that was the case (and we never will)
2008: Murkier now: in many ways a repeat of 1988, but now it was a choice of a continuation of politics we didn't like or the tank-driving weenie. For some reason I chose the guy in the tank (Otis the Drunk from Andy Griffith would have been the better tank guy choice, though).
And now we come to 2012 and I don't know what to think. Today I went to get the mail and we were bombarded with political ads, and they often canceled each other out. Example: we have Shelley Berekely running for dog catcher...that or Senator from Nevada, there's not much difference. One ad shows her in a positive, take-charge stance and the anti-Berkeley ad makes her look like a werewolf with hemmerhoids! It's the bad marketing that clouds what these people are REALLY about.
I mean, I could see myself running for office, say, Galactic Overlord in charge of Velcro distribution. All of the positive ads would have me standing proud, looking straight at the camera with a smile and Burger King Whopper juice dripping down my chin to show my patriotism, and the negative ad would be some shot of me that my daughter Natalie took of me while I was sitting on the crapper, making me out to be an agent of the Dark Side...with hemmerhoids! I could have shown the universe that Velcro is the glue that binds us and the galaxy together, but the shot of me "concentrating" would cloud my whole campaign.
So, tomorrow (or today which is the most likely), when you vote, try to look past all the ads, marketing and other gimmicks that cloud the issues...and get me and Berkeley some Preparation H if you're at the store!
Let's think back to 1984...the last election I vividly remember (well, I vaguely remember 1980, but all I remember is Reagan delivering a beating most men couldn't withstand, and Carter withstood nothing). No, 1984 was easy: Reagan stood for Republican American commie-fighting goodness while Mondale stood for evil taxation...and Reagan delivered another solid beating.
1988: Reagan's quiet veep vs. a tank-riding weenie. I think we all foresaw 4 great years of Saturday Night Live with Dana Carvey as Bush...nuff said.
1992: Bush vs. Clinton vs (at times) Perot. Frankly, I was prepared to vote for Perot until he dropped out unexpectedly. Carvey was leaving SNL soon, and by 1992 the comedy was long over.
1996: Clinton vs. well, a major Republican jackhole. Clinton was doing well, it was a solid decision.
2000: I'm still troubled by this one. I feel that we'd be in a different place if Gore (who I voted for) had been declared winner. It'd be nice to imagine no 9/11, but that's no certainty It'd be nice to imagine the economic prosperity would have continued a bit longer. OK...I'll move on before sounding too much like John Lennon.
2004: OK, I'll admit it, I voted for Kerry, and that may have been a mistake. I just knew I didn't want 4 more years of Cliff Barnes in office, but that's what we got anyway. I thinik this is when I felt things were murky: evil or a lesser evil. I thought I chose a lesser evil and I'm not sure that was the case (and we never will)
2008: Murkier now: in many ways a repeat of 1988, but now it was a choice of a continuation of politics we didn't like or the tank-driving weenie. For some reason I chose the guy in the tank (Otis the Drunk from Andy Griffith would have been the better tank guy choice, though).
And now we come to 2012 and I don't know what to think. Today I went to get the mail and we were bombarded with political ads, and they often canceled each other out. Example: we have Shelley Berekely running for dog catcher...that or Senator from Nevada, there's not much difference. One ad shows her in a positive, take-charge stance and the anti-Berkeley ad makes her look like a werewolf with hemmerhoids! It's the bad marketing that clouds what these people are REALLY about.
I mean, I could see myself running for office, say, Galactic Overlord in charge of Velcro distribution. All of the positive ads would have me standing proud, looking straight at the camera with a smile and Burger King Whopper juice dripping down my chin to show my patriotism, and the negative ad would be some shot of me that my daughter Natalie took of me while I was sitting on the crapper, making me out to be an agent of the Dark Side...with hemmerhoids! I could have shown the universe that Velcro is the glue that binds us and the galaxy together, but the shot of me "concentrating" would cloud my whole campaign.
So, tomorrow (or today which is the most likely), when you vote, try to look past all the ads, marketing and other gimmicks that cloud the issues...and get me and Berkeley some Preparation H if you're at the store!
Friday, August 10, 2012
Music Does Rescue
Thinking of the past...the DEEP past, recently. Not obsessively, of course, like my dream for old Hollywood Squares shows or EDGE OF NIGHT episodes to come on DVD. Someitmes I just lay in bed in the morning at peace and I think of the "good old days", whatever that means. For me, the good old days mean something completely different....they mean a time when I was relatively at peace with myself, liking me for me without giving a damn about anyone else's opinions. OK, fine, there was never REALLY a time like that, but of late I've been going through a change and with any change there's a thinking back period. The time: 1995, a year of true change for me. While there was a lot of unpleasantness then, the one thing that kept me going was...music!
Luckily for me, the music I refer to was not 90s crap. I don't think ANY of it was inspring, calming, or even angering for reaction sake. No, back then I was really into older material, generally 60s and 70s pop and rock. I made an audio tape long ago chronicling that peculiar year, and I don't know what happened to it to this day.
Early in the year, during the holiday break between semesters, I'd bought a tape of pop songs released between 1970-74. My favorite song on it was "Diamond Girl"...it made me look forward to coming back to school to see a certain someone again. Life at home was pretty tense between my parents and I couldn't wait to escape. That tape was played twice on my drive back to school in late January. Of course, there were other good songs on the tape: Mr. Bojangles, Midnight Train to Georgia, Venus, and You're So Vain, among others.
Two months later, I got the call that really changed my life...the call from my mom that she was divorcing my dad. I was torn apart by this, of course. As time went on, I was forced to as well. I continued to listen to oldies and classic rock. One night, Oscar night, in fact, I was working on a paper and had "American Graffiti" playing in the background. I'd never seen it before and was just loving the doo wop music that apparently George Lucas grew up on. That summer, I bought the soundtrack, along with some Rascals CD. I was also listening a lot to The Doors album "Waiting for the Sun", newly acquired the previous Christmas and first listened to on the drive back home for the summer...home, what did that mean anymore? Nothing. It was a concept split between a bed slept on for almost 20 years and a futon bed my mom got just for me when I visited. No, home was no longer San Diego. It wasn't really PA anymore, either. Although I was still entrenched in dorm life, I loved northern California more than anything else at this point, and was already growing anxious to return. The girl I liked that semester, well, I still liked, but there was tension there and there was someone else from my classes that I'd found interest in (ah, college!)
Well, an oldies/classic rock summer got me through what silence would have devastated: edge of sanity. Living with a newly divorced dad who felt guilty about dating, along with a pregnant sister and her toddler firstborn, and spending part-time with a newly-free and happy for the first time I could remember mom, was bizarre and quite troubling. Having a job helped, but hell was hell.
Coming back to school in August, I'd found a new interest in old Doobie Brothers music, particularly "Black Water". I felt free at first...then I met the 4th roommate that was to complete the roommate situation at school with Rob, Scott and myself...a guy named Ed. A new hell was emerging, but it wasn't really mine, it was his! Rob and Scott were good guys (and still are) and I didn't like subjecting them to my new anger at the state of my life. Yes, once I left the 2 nests, I felt ok to be angry about it all. Unfortunately, the stranger named Ed was the target of my anger and, later, some cruel pranks at his expense. Incidentally I feel bad about what I did now, but I feel no guilt about my feelings then. Around this time, The Beatles and The Yardbirds were finding my ears. Also, more Doors with "Soft Parade" and "Morrison Hotel". I listened to those albums coming home for Christmas in late 1995.
Early 1996 was much of the same, but the music discovery was dying down a bit. Emerson Lake and Palmer and America were ringing in my ears as well, but I had all the music I wanted for a while...also, Scott was subscribing to Time Life's Guitar Rock, so I was in music heaven while personal hell was just under the surface...and I mean just.
Now, 17 year later, I guess I've grown somewhat bored with the old music...I find myself skipping those songs on the iPod often. They don't hold the relevancy they once did, or maybe I just don't want to delve into that past much. Who would? 22 was a hellish year for me...and now I'm seeing 40 in 3 months. Only Paul Lynde holds the answers now, LOL!
Luckily for me, the music I refer to was not 90s crap. I don't think ANY of it was inspring, calming, or even angering for reaction sake. No, back then I was really into older material, generally 60s and 70s pop and rock. I made an audio tape long ago chronicling that peculiar year, and I don't know what happened to it to this day.
Early in the year, during the holiday break between semesters, I'd bought a tape of pop songs released between 1970-74. My favorite song on it was "Diamond Girl"...it made me look forward to coming back to school to see a certain someone again. Life at home was pretty tense between my parents and I couldn't wait to escape. That tape was played twice on my drive back to school in late January. Of course, there were other good songs on the tape: Mr. Bojangles, Midnight Train to Georgia, Venus, and You're So Vain, among others.
Two months later, I got the call that really changed my life...the call from my mom that she was divorcing my dad. I was torn apart by this, of course. As time went on, I was forced to as well. I continued to listen to oldies and classic rock. One night, Oscar night, in fact, I was working on a paper and had "American Graffiti" playing in the background. I'd never seen it before and was just loving the doo wop music that apparently George Lucas grew up on. That summer, I bought the soundtrack, along with some Rascals CD. I was also listening a lot to The Doors album "Waiting for the Sun", newly acquired the previous Christmas and first listened to on the drive back home for the summer...home, what did that mean anymore? Nothing. It was a concept split between a bed slept on for almost 20 years and a futon bed my mom got just for me when I visited. No, home was no longer San Diego. It wasn't really PA anymore, either. Although I was still entrenched in dorm life, I loved northern California more than anything else at this point, and was already growing anxious to return. The girl I liked that semester, well, I still liked, but there was tension there and there was someone else from my classes that I'd found interest in (ah, college!)
Well, an oldies/classic rock summer got me through what silence would have devastated: edge of sanity. Living with a newly divorced dad who felt guilty about dating, along with a pregnant sister and her toddler firstborn, and spending part-time with a newly-free and happy for the first time I could remember mom, was bizarre and quite troubling. Having a job helped, but hell was hell.
Coming back to school in August, I'd found a new interest in old Doobie Brothers music, particularly "Black Water". I felt free at first...then I met the 4th roommate that was to complete the roommate situation at school with Rob, Scott and myself...a guy named Ed. A new hell was emerging, but it wasn't really mine, it was his! Rob and Scott were good guys (and still are) and I didn't like subjecting them to my new anger at the state of my life. Yes, once I left the 2 nests, I felt ok to be angry about it all. Unfortunately, the stranger named Ed was the target of my anger and, later, some cruel pranks at his expense. Incidentally I feel bad about what I did now, but I feel no guilt about my feelings then. Around this time, The Beatles and The Yardbirds were finding my ears. Also, more Doors with "Soft Parade" and "Morrison Hotel". I listened to those albums coming home for Christmas in late 1995.
Early 1996 was much of the same, but the music discovery was dying down a bit. Emerson Lake and Palmer and America were ringing in my ears as well, but I had all the music I wanted for a while...also, Scott was subscribing to Time Life's Guitar Rock, so I was in music heaven while personal hell was just under the surface...and I mean just.
Now, 17 year later, I guess I've grown somewhat bored with the old music...I find myself skipping those songs on the iPod often. They don't hold the relevancy they once did, or maybe I just don't want to delve into that past much. Who would? 22 was a hellish year for me...and now I'm seeing 40 in 3 months. Only Paul Lynde holds the answers now, LOL!
Saturday, August 4, 2012
Whose birthday is it anyway???
An easy question to answer: if there is a birthday party for my daughter, who is the center of attention? Well, apparently it's my sister-in-law and her uninvited guest. Well, at least that was the case at my daughter's 3rd birthday party.
Let me step back a moment...rather, let me step back 35 years. The earliest birthday I can remember anymore is my 5th. We had our neighbors and friends the Kirkners over for dinner and birthday cake. I opened presents, and the focus was definitely on me. I don't mean to sound egotistical about this, like I was trying to steal the show, but the purpose was always clear that they were there to celebrate my day.
A year later, I had a much bigger party. The Kirkner kids were there, along with other kids on the street. I also had kids from my kindergarten class there. We had lunch, opened presents, and played games. It was fun! At least it looked fun from the pictures and home movies. The adults provided food, entertainment...and were supervising. It sounds strange to say that last part, but I'll get to that in a bit.
My next major party was my 9th. Once again it was kids in the 'hood and classmates. We went bowling and had hot dogs at the alley party room. Two years later it was Chuck-E-Cheese, a short-lived experiment at the Berkshire Mall. Same thing: we opened presents, then went to eat and have fun! My next (and last) party as a kid was when I turned 15. I had some guys over for a sleepover. We had pizza, cake, watched some movies (including one porn, I am not ashamed to say from a teen's point of view).
The running theme throughout all of these parties was that they were kid-oriented although adults were clearly in charge and supervising (but not hovering). It was the same when my sister had a birthday party. The only difference was that she wasn't trying to crash my parties...I just crashed hers like an annoying little brother was supposed to do.
Over the years, I know parties have changed. Sometimes there are themes (like a superhero or princess), sometimes a clown, balloon artist, or face painter is hired. There are sometimes also rented bouncers. I get that. The level of entertainment has increased somewhat with a lot of people. However, there are two things that should not go away: the kid-centered aspect and the parental supervision.
Since meeting my wife (actually, we met BEFORE getting married, a rarity in Vegas, I know), I have been exposed, many times, to a different sort of party. In this type of party, a very select group of adults are invited and they bring their kids if they have any. The men go to the garage, the women sit and text and talk about whom they have texted with (often a person sitting two feet away), and the kids are off riding bikes, playing video games, or sitting zoned off in front of the TV. Occasionally an adult will scream at their kid to ask what they are doing, just to practice parenting. The focus is not on the child, but rather on adults. At some point, gifts are opened and cake is eaten, but those are the only two times everyone is together, and it is less than 5 minutes of unity in total.
I'm not comfy with these parties. I generally don't hang around with the guys because all they talk about is what they did to make their car look cooler (not move better, strangely) and drink beer. I dig the beer aspect, but I'm a geek and could give a rat's ass about the cosmetic surgery.I don't want to hang around the women because I have an ancient form of practiced communication: I find common ground and TALK about that common ground. These women are all mostly tattooed, pierced, generally devoid of wordly usefulness. So, often my wife and I sit ignored. Why were invited (oh yeah, we're family) is beyond me. If we're not included, don't invite, we'll send a card later.
Then we come to my daughter's recent party. Granted, there were more adults because living in an apartment complex makes it hard to find kids Natalie's age. I sat with some of the invited guests to share recent life experiences and ask how they are doing with genuine interest. Then, some family arrives like expected and provide pizza. Then, more family arrives...with add-ons! Natalie plays with the kids as well as she can keep up. However, one family member and her friend gab on and progressively force everyone to hear them through sheer volume. A lot of times, the talk is not kid-friendly. At the end, we are left with two invited guests for Natalie to impress until she is wiped out then us adults continue talking pleasantly. I liked this part of the evening.
Am I old-fashioned? Maybe so, but I know the basics of a proper party for kids and lately I haven't seen one. Probably the last one was our goddaughter's party at a roller rink before she moved away. To conclude, keep it kid-centered, friendly, and together.
Let me step back a moment...rather, let me step back 35 years. The earliest birthday I can remember anymore is my 5th. We had our neighbors and friends the Kirkners over for dinner and birthday cake. I opened presents, and the focus was definitely on me. I don't mean to sound egotistical about this, like I was trying to steal the show, but the purpose was always clear that they were there to celebrate my day.
A year later, I had a much bigger party. The Kirkner kids were there, along with other kids on the street. I also had kids from my kindergarten class there. We had lunch, opened presents, and played games. It was fun! At least it looked fun from the pictures and home movies. The adults provided food, entertainment...and were supervising. It sounds strange to say that last part, but I'll get to that in a bit.
My next major party was my 9th. Once again it was kids in the 'hood and classmates. We went bowling and had hot dogs at the alley party room. Two years later it was Chuck-E-Cheese, a short-lived experiment at the Berkshire Mall. Same thing: we opened presents, then went to eat and have fun! My next (and last) party as a kid was when I turned 15. I had some guys over for a sleepover. We had pizza, cake, watched some movies (including one porn, I am not ashamed to say from a teen's point of view).
The running theme throughout all of these parties was that they were kid-oriented although adults were clearly in charge and supervising (but not hovering). It was the same when my sister had a birthday party. The only difference was that she wasn't trying to crash my parties...I just crashed hers like an annoying little brother was supposed to do.
Over the years, I know parties have changed. Sometimes there are themes (like a superhero or princess), sometimes a clown, balloon artist, or face painter is hired. There are sometimes also rented bouncers. I get that. The level of entertainment has increased somewhat with a lot of people. However, there are two things that should not go away: the kid-centered aspect and the parental supervision.
Since meeting my wife (actually, we met BEFORE getting married, a rarity in Vegas, I know), I have been exposed, many times, to a different sort of party. In this type of party, a very select group of adults are invited and they bring their kids if they have any. The men go to the garage, the women sit and text and talk about whom they have texted with (often a person sitting two feet away), and the kids are off riding bikes, playing video games, or sitting zoned off in front of the TV. Occasionally an adult will scream at their kid to ask what they are doing, just to practice parenting. The focus is not on the child, but rather on adults. At some point, gifts are opened and cake is eaten, but those are the only two times everyone is together, and it is less than 5 minutes of unity in total.
I'm not comfy with these parties. I generally don't hang around with the guys because all they talk about is what they did to make their car look cooler (not move better, strangely) and drink beer. I dig the beer aspect, but I'm a geek and could give a rat's ass about the cosmetic surgery.I don't want to hang around the women because I have an ancient form of practiced communication: I find common ground and TALK about that common ground. These women are all mostly tattooed, pierced, generally devoid of wordly usefulness. So, often my wife and I sit ignored. Why were invited (oh yeah, we're family) is beyond me. If we're not included, don't invite, we'll send a card later.
Then we come to my daughter's recent party. Granted, there were more adults because living in an apartment complex makes it hard to find kids Natalie's age. I sat with some of the invited guests to share recent life experiences and ask how they are doing with genuine interest. Then, some family arrives like expected and provide pizza. Then, more family arrives...with add-ons! Natalie plays with the kids as well as she can keep up. However, one family member and her friend gab on and progressively force everyone to hear them through sheer volume. A lot of times, the talk is not kid-friendly. At the end, we are left with two invited guests for Natalie to impress until she is wiped out then us adults continue talking pleasantly. I liked this part of the evening.
Am I old-fashioned? Maybe so, but I know the basics of a proper party for kids and lately I haven't seen one. Probably the last one was our goddaughter's party at a roller rink before she moved away. To conclude, keep it kid-centered, friendly, and together.
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