A long time ago I wrote a piece called "The Basement Generation", based entirely on a conversation I overheard with 2 colleagues. It wasn't far off, and was based on the premise that the youth of then (2013) would be doomed to live in their parents' basements...that is, for those who are fortunate to have a basement to live in.
When I think of a functional living quarters basement, I think of 2 places. One is my childhood friend Jeremy's house in West Lawn,Pennsylvania. There was sufficient moving around space, a small bar, TV setup, mini fridge, and computer area...plus his dad's generous Playboy magazine collection. The other is my cousin Craig's house in the UP of Michigan. Almost like Jeremy's except it actually has a bed...not sure about the magazines.
Sadly, the western states tend not to have much in the way of basements in their residences. Even more, I think the youith of the western states are more prone to be living with the folks well into their late 20s or even early 30s.
As I have seen and heard much more in my profession in the last 11 years, I have come to the non-scientific conclusion that the kids are victims of an overprotective system that somehow evolved from a tougher atmosphere that eroded throughout the decades.
"Bryan, you are full of it!", you may say. Hell, my wife says it frequently, so I am used to it. All of that said, there is so much environmental evidence out there to support my claim.
Now, before I begin, I should defend that "western states" bit from earlier. To me, the western states are the Rockies and west from there. I could even narrow it to the 50-100 miles of land heading east from the Pacific coastline, but I've met a few from Idaho and Colorado and certainly from Nevada to broaden the scope.
Back where I grew up in eastern Pennsylvania, there was a general toughness and not giving a shit attitude about a lot of things, at least when I was there. I can't speak for 32 years later. Nobody really fought over politics or gun rights or anything that infects society today...until you spoke badly about Penn State football. If you had the cahones to do that, you were lucky to get a ten second head start before you lost somet5hing vital, the least of which was your bladder.
Parents generally kicked you out of the house after breakfast and did not expect to see you again until at least 4pm if not later.
Playgrounds and parks had a metal-based system of swings, monkey bars, merry go rounds, and slides that supported emotional and physical growth. If you flew off, you flew off. There was grass. You dusted yourself off (if needed) and went back to it. If you sustained a head or extremity injury, it might have been a few days before try number 2.
The schools had a pretty easy system to figure out. If you sat and listened and took notes, you had a shot at some good grades. If not, it was likely because you were talking and/or dicking around. An A was 90-100%, a B was 80-89, a C was 70-79, a D was 60-69, and an E/F was the lower 59%. I will be honest here, in my 12th grade classes, I was not really into the school thing anymore and therefore tuned out trigonometry and physics...getting Ds regularly in both classes. On a few trig tests I received a generous 20% and knew why.
Given all of that and knowing that I was far from the toughest bunch, I managed to hold my own. I didn't go out of my way to piss people off, but due to my nerdish nature I was a pretty easy pick-on target. Yet I never had the crap beat out of me or had my head put in the toilet for a ceremonial swirly. In all, I had a good time of it growing up, and was fairly prepared to take on adult life later on...fairly being the key word.
Let's fast forward about 7 years after graduation, when I was a new substitute teacher in Sonoma County, California. I noticed a general trend of what I considered odd behaviors, with both kids and their parents. Now, I was a fairly sensitive guy (and not the kind women purportedly go for) but I was getting a hint of OVERsensitivity. Even third and fourth graders seemed to have a shield at 30% strength. Some parents kept their kids home if they knew there was a sub. More than one parent came up to me and told me how the day would go for their darling kid, damn the others, and if I stepped one little bit out of focus, the principal would be notified. Out of my 4 1/2 years of subbing in many elementary schools in many districts, I was taken off the list of only 2 schools and that was in one district (Santa Rosa City Schools). Otherwise, a good track record.
Once I was truly immersed in the education system as a full time teacher in Las Vegas, I saw so many changes.
The once vibrant playgrounds had evolved into a plastic mesh of just a small spiral slide and some climb-across bars...usually accompanied by an oil-based spongy base so there would be no owies. The little ones are generally ok with this, but by 3rd grade it's a waste of space and offers little in the way of physical and emotional growth.
Even if a kid receives one of my classic trig test grades, the minimum I can give is 50%. Not sure who this helps in the long run.
And then comes the tech, and here is where it gets what I consider tragic.
I've never been a supporter of being best friends with one's child. It is good to have a healthy and positive relationship for sure, but when discipline erodes in favor of making sure your kid likes you no matter what, it infects the child's growth as well as the parent's own well being. On the flip side, making what is essentially a public utility a parental substitute is also damaging.
I lead the tech bit with that because the tech has become of very essence of many children's lives. We go into restaurants and see some kids and their families interacting, and other kids playing on a device while the adults talk or be on their own devices.
30 years ago the Internet was an new thing, now kids are planning a career as a web influencer or professional gamer or professional Youtuber...thinking it will make them millions instantly based on what they see on various social media sites.
And on top of the tech, there is a growing society of fear. Fear of COVID and germs in general is what I have noticed especially. Fear of their child being labeled as having something like ADHD. School shootings and the public threats of such have not helped matters any.
I wish I could go into the "nonbinary" realm, but I know so little I will just stay in my lane...but much of that controversial realm fits what I am getting at.
I have seen social media posts that say parents and schools should not try to prepare their kids for a world that no longer exists...and to a large extent that world of the child growing into a mature adult ready to take on the world in their early 20s does NOT exist, with a few exceptions, those being privileged expensive prep school students who are just waiting for their turn in line to control government or industry or both. Or, there are the kids who have firm goals in mind for when they get out of high school and plan ahead. Those cases are getting rarer and rarer, but they do exist.
As for the rest, it will be a tough road, for even the parents who work for lucrative companies and/or industries are finding more and more that the employer contributions to retirement and/or health care are getting slimmer and slimmer due to trying times or just plain corporate greed. Add to that just plain inflation. And if the kids are living in the basement or just never left their room, supporting them just with food and health care will be a tough cookie to crumble.
Sadly, much of this was avoidable years ago when the biggest tech advancement was the DVD. Yet so many "easy" roads were offered since then in the way of affordable tech and participation trophies and what not that the instant gratification was practically pre-destined. In fact, the kids I taught 21 years ago are parents now, and the trend I saw the seeds of then are fully grown with their kids...and those roots are so firmly entrenched that unless there is a "world code" depicted in "Escape From L.A." where Snake Plissken shuts everything down with one button push, the problem will no longer be a problem...it'll be just life.
Remember my dream about returning to 1972? It has not disappeared.
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