As I drove my new Corolla down Cajon Pass last week, I wondered if I'd reach San Diego alive! It was only Tuesday and things were backing up already! Not that I'd expect any less, the Cajon pass is a mess of cars and trucks either braking down a long decline or trying to race through the maze of vehicles at all times! However, as I continued into Rancho Cucamonga and northern Riverside County past several major freeway interchanges, I was almost frozen with panic as cars weaved irresponsibly without signal through the lanes to get to...wherever...my guess would be the theme compounds in Orange County, since after Corona, the stress level eased considerably, and the drive into San Diego County was relatively stressless.
It wasn't always this bad, at least traffic-wise.
In 1992, my parents moved from Reading, Pennsylvania to San Diego, California. I was still in college at the time, pushing somewhat weakly through my classes at West Virginia University. I was definitely a small fish in a big pond then, and was realizing that maybe I'd made a mistake in my college selection. I was about to find out that the small fish feeling was to remain for a bit longer.
During Spring Break, I took a plane trip to spend time in my future new surroundings. I had never been to San Diego before then, but I'd seen San Francisco, Los Angeles, and Yosemite, so I was excited for something new. When I arrived in the evening, I noticed that the airport was very close to downtown. That downtown twinkled pleasantly at night and made me feel welcome.
At that point, my parents had not yet moved to the house on Carmel Ridge Road, they were renting an apartment on El Cajon Blvd near the La Mesa city limit. I was really glad to see our old Scottish terrier Mac waiting for us, though he had to have a muzzle in the apartment while we were gone. During that week, we went to see a show at the Improv with my Aunt Terry, saw the new house, drove all around the area, and saw a movie or two. My dad was working on the regular days, so my mom and I hung out most of that time, though we were all together for dinners.
My initial impression of San Diego was positive for the most part, and since I wasn't really enjoying college life (and my GPA reflected that more or less), I opened my mind to it. My one big sadness was not seeing any of my old buddies in Pennsylvania anymore. Apart from my aunt, cousin, and parents, I had nobody else in San Diego...at least not yet.
In early May, I took off permanently for San Diego. My dad picked me up at the airport, and my mom had my favorite dinner (chicken, mashed potatoes, corn, and cranberry sauce) ready at the new house. All my stuff was set up in my new room. The only thing I had to do was adjust. That weekend we went out to celebrate Mother's Day at a nice restaurant, and in that month, my dad and I enjoyed the final Johnny Carson show together. Well, that was May.
The summer was spent somewhat well, with my mom and I taking extension courses at UCSD...she went for paralegal and I went for screenwriting. Nothing ever came of either, but I did get to practice a new craft and it got me writing a bit more. Apart from that, I had no wheels, so my mom or dad had to cart me around. It wasn't all that fun and mostly I was staying up late and sleeping in late.
In the fall I took some really dis-spiriting jobs as a vacuum salesperson, product demonstrater at Price Club (later Costco), and advertising flyer deliverer in Rancho Bernardo. The vacuum gig, failed as it was, got me more oriented with the San Diego area, but that was about it. My cousin giving me her old Nintendo didn't really help me much. In fact, it isolated me more and it wasn't healthy.
My Aunt Terry had gotten married (or rather remarried) to a nice Finnish guy and he and I got along great. In fact, I'd say Pekkah Taipale was probably the best friend I made in my time in San Diego. With him in town were his two sisters, a brother in law, and some other remote family members we got to know.
In early 1993, my mom finally found employment at a college library and my sister got married up in Ridgecrest where she was stationed in the Navy. Apart from another extension course (in Spanish) and a short term job putting together a dollar store that lasted a couple weeks, I wasn't making much social progress...or financial or anything else.
Then came May and I had established residency...that meant getting me back to school! A new era had begun. I didn't really make permanent alliances while at Miramar College, but I was focused for the first time in a while, and I did meet some good classmates in all the semesters I was there (4 semesters total). College also meant being around females more often. That was definitely healthy!
On school days, I would drive to campus listening to The Doors, attend a class or two, maybe head home for lunch and a nap, then go back for more. I also found a really good Chinese place for lunch in that time...the Quik Wok. It was there that I found a scrumptious garlic chicken dish that was to become my staple for a year.
Besides a tour of college campuses in northern California and a soul-refreshing visit to Pennsylvania for New Year's, school was dominant focus and as I had chosen Sonoma State, my pursuit of good to great grades increased. In the summer 1994 semester, I even made the dean's list!
I seem to deviate from the San Diego topic here, but aside from school in that second year, I didn't really see much aside from our house where I did school work, wrote a bit here and there, and ate and slept, and the Miramar College campus, I didn't have much else...until I found the beach!
It does sound strange that it took me nearly 2 years to find the jewel that San Diego really was! I don't even remember how it happened or exactly when, but one day I drove around and came upon a parking lot for Torrey Pines State Beach. It was free, so I parked, walked all the way up to Del Mar, then back. The next time, I did the same but had a beer or 2 at a local pub, then walked back. Aside form Quik Wok, I had a new pastime. Actually, I came to the beach more than I was downing garlic chicken after a while.
As Sonoma State approached, I did the beach a lot more. I hadn't made any permanent alliances at school, though I was sort of becoming a groupie/friend of sorts with a local metal band (one of its members was a classmate). Female pursuits hadn't really materialized, and when you're 21 and living with parents and unemployed, there's not much of a draw.
My departure for Sonoma State pretty much ended my 2 year experience in San Diego. I did go back for holidays and visits and still do occasionally. In those ensuing years, my parents divorced and found new loves and eventual marriages...and my mom lost her second husband.
Our most recent visit was brief due to budget, but we stayed in Encinitas and did some beach time while visiting with my dad and stepmom in La Jolla for a few hours. I loved the time actually there, but not the travel. The new generation of drivers scares the shit out of me.
My overall opinion of San Diego itself is positive. It's a beautiful area geographically and it has several microclimates. If you want beach, there's plenty of that. If you want mountains, visit Julian sometime and enjoy some apple pie and coffee while there. If you want desert without casinos, check out Borrego Springs. Inland San Diego where we lived is mostly residential with the necessary retail accommodations, with towns like Lemon Grove, El Cajon, La Mesa, Poway, Santee, and Escondido. My sister and her first husband lived in Escondido for a short time with their first child, and North County Fair was a half decent mall.
In terms of traffic, it wasn't bad 30 years ago, but since then, I 5 and I 15 are hell in a handbasket!
As to my personal memories, they are of loneliness and depression in those 2 years, though less so in year two. Having a variety of connections is key.
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