The funniest thing happened to us. We were on an airplane to Colorado Springs and they showed an in-flight movie (I'd LOVE to see an out-flight movie example, though). The movie had some scenes of violence that my daughter didn't really need to see. I asked the stewardess/flight attendant/ air deity/ beverage commissioner, whatever they want to be called this week, if they could raise, not the monitor in front of us. She looked at the wrestling unsupervised 7-year olds behind us and knew they wouldn't mind. She then smiled and said she would be right back. It was quite a long wait, because the next thing we knew, we were getting off the plane in Salt Lake City. When asked why, we were told we were a security risk! Now, at first I was flattered that they'd think this of me, a guy who thoroughly rinses his nail clippers after violent nose hair removal! However, I then realized that our flying future was in serious jeopardy!
Of course, I then came to my senses and continued bowling on the WII. This didn't happen to us, but it did happen to an unlucky family flying from Denver to Baltimore. Although personally I would have stayed in Denver for aesthetic reasons, this family was rerouted to Chicago because of the movie thing. The two parents and their 4-year old and 8-year old were considered security risks for asking that the movie monitor be turned off or raised or whatever because the movie being shown was not ok for the child to watch!
Is this what it has come down to? Not only can we not bring our own food and beverages until we get past the security rape and into the overpriced airport food court, not only are we not supposed to ask for Diet Coke because it takes too long to pour at that altitude, we are apparently not allowed to make simple requests! I would personally like to see a list of what are considered security risks besides nail files and nail clippers and fingers in noses and Justin Bieber key chains (oh I HOPE that last one is added!).
I suspect that the truth is scarier, that there is no real list of things, apart from the security scanner alerts. No, the decision in the Denver-to-Baltimore situation was all the pilot's! He had the authority to reroute the flight to Chicago and delay the other passengers and thoroughly inconvenience the family in question here! I have a pretty good idea what pilots have to do to get to their status in life and that it takes some good money to get your pilot's license. However, flying a large group of people from one place to another several times during a day doesn't empower you to make life-changing decisions for other people, especially if they make simple requests! Think of that family. They may now be on a "security risk" list. If they're not forbidden from flying, they may be strip-search requirements!
Well, by golly, we are indeed going to Colorado Springs in early June and we have a 3 1/2 year old with us. Just last summer, she was a security risk by not wearing her shoes when going to the bathroom solitary confinement chamber and just wearing a pull-up a lot of the flight time as well. I was a HUGE security threat by demanding to know why the airline wouldn't take cash for their snack box! Coming back from Orlando, the young man next to us was a security risk because he, too, at 13, only had cash and no card for a snack!
Ladies and gentlemen, all 6 of you who read my stuff, please understand that we as a nation are crumbling due to paranoia. No enemy needs to bomb us, we are bombing ourselves! We need to take action and tell the FAA to chill out! We need to demand good-natured pilots! We need discreet onboard snack generals! We need...oh, yeah, I want the Oreo snack box, do you need my debit card?
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