Rhapsody Slimmed

   Have you ever noticed that there is a time at the end of the school year, like a week before summer is due to commence, there is always a student who is not going to make it out. This is generally not an elementary school problem, more of middle and high school. I have seen memes of this scenario where the parent or student is appealing to the teacher to create a quick and miraculous cure to that failing grade at the 11th and a half hour. It likely goes something like this.

Hello? 

Yes, Mrs. Parker, I got your message later on last evening but it was a bit late to call back.

Well, I got it at 10:30p.m. Anyway, I saw that you're concerned about Karr's grade.

Oh yes, I'm concerned, too. Right now he's holding at a 23%.

No, we don't do the 50% minimum F here.

No, Mrs. Parker, and I can guarantee my principal will back me on this. Karr has not completed any of the class assignments and projects I gave. In fact, I might be giving him too much credit to say he did not complete them, he likely did not begin them, either. In fact, the only reason he is holding a grade as high as he has is because he deigned to come to class and attempt to pass a few tests.

Well, sure he got a couple questions right here and there, but those were review questions from last year's material.

Mrs. Parker, I know he is trying out for every sport there is, but our coaches check their grades before the kids even try out. It's school policy.

No, no, I am not trying to deny him greatness on the athletic field, but he has to earn that greatness in the classroom first. A 70% mimimum is required to try out, even for cheerleaders.

Mrs. Parker, I'm not suggesting that your son tries out for the cheerleading team, my point was-

Yes, thank you for understanding.

You want him to pass. Well, I want him to pass, too. This is his second year of basic algebra and he should have been in geometry.

Mrs. Parker, Karr has a 23% as of today and even if he passes his final exam next week, he won't have a passing grade for the year.

That's right, even if he scores a 100%. I have to give it to you, Mrs. Parker, your optimism is inspiring.

Extra credit? Well, Mrs. Parker, I usually assign that to students who are on the cusp of getting a B or an A and they just need a little booster.

Well, of course everyone deserves an opportunity, I don't deny that. The problem is that extra credit involves a project that demonstrates their understanding of what I've been teaching them all year. Karr has not shown that understanding.

(sigh) Look, this is high school, not elementary. I don't give word searches at this stage, and we're talking basic algebra here. 

How basic? Mrs. Parker, I spent the first two weeks reviewing order of operations and several of the kids, Karr included, couldn't even multiply without a times table in front of them.

Mrs. Parker, there were several opportunities for him to get tutoring and attend summer school, none of which were taken advantage of for his whole time in this district, which would be seven years.

I like my summers, too, and I am about to embark on mine. That said, I do offer tutoring during the month of June, as do other teachers trying to make an extra buck or two.

(sigh) Mrs. Parker, I worry about Karr graduating on time, which would be in two years. Now, how is he doing in his other classes, if I may ask?

He's doing about the same? 

Mrs. Parker, I will confess to you that I was held back in kindergarten, back in the days when the system believed in that. 

If you want to say I flunked, fine. My point is, that extra year of skills reinforcement helped me to grasp new concepts later as they came. Otherwise I might have struggled as Karr has obviously been.

No, it's not a bad mark on his record if he's held back. If the system held more kids back when needed instead of pushing them through, we'd have more genuine graduates with genuine diplomas as opposed to 12th grade exit certificates...which don't even buy a free Big Mac..

All right, Mrs. Parker, you can talk to the principal if you like, but he won't give him a fake pass on this class, either. He'll just push him up like the district tells him to.

Same to you, Mrs. Parker. Bye now.

Can anyone relate to the teacher? Maybe the parent?

End of year Rhapsody

    Actually, my school year ended over 3 weeks ago. Opposed to years past, this school year ended well for me stress-wise, making the beginning of the next school year better anticipated.

   My first year at a new school, my 4th school in fact, could have gone either way. I had made a decision to do whatever it took to make the year positive. Were there a few bumps? Sure, but minor ones, and I worked with a grade level team where communal growth was the theme, a more Kumbaya vibe than I have ever felt in 23 years.

   It was also my first year working for a male principal, a male assistant principal and a female assistant principal. Now, I might rub someone the wrong way here, but I'm used to that. I've found that working for 2 males, at least in this case, was more direct and I was observed many times with constructive feedback. It kept me on my game.

   My class size was never above 18, and the 18 was due to an unruly kid placed in my room as babysitting the last two weeks.

   All right, enough of review. Time for a little of my Bob Newhart-style interplay. 

   Have you ever noticed that there is a time at the end of the school year, like a week before summer is due to commence, there is always a student who is not going to make it out. This is generally not an elementary school problem, more of middle and high school. I have seen memes of this scenario where the parent or student is appealing to the teacher to create a quick and miraculous cure to that failing grade at the 11th and a half hour. It likely goes something like this.

Hello? 

Yes, Mrs. Parker, I got your message later on last evening but it was a bit late to call back.

Well, I got it at 10:30p.m. Anyway, I saw that you're concerned about Karr's grade.

Oh yes, I'm concerned, too. Right now he's holding at a 23%.

No, we don't do the 50% minimum F here.

No, Mrs. Parker, and I can guarantee my principal will back me on this. Karr has not completed any of the class assignments and projects I gave. In fact, I might be giving him too much credit to say he did not complete them, he likely did not begin them, either. In fact, the only reason he is holding a grade as high as he has is because he deigned to come to class and attempt to pass a few tests.

Well, sure he got a couple questions right here and there, but those were review questions from last year's material.

Mrs. Parker, I know he is trying out for every sport there is, but our coaches check their grades before the kids even try out. It's school policy.

No, no, I am not trying to deny him greatness on the athletic field, but he has to earn that greatness in the classroom first. A 70% mimimum is required to try out, even for cheerleaders.

Mrs. Parker, I'm not suggesting that your son tries out for the cheerleading team, my point was-

Yes, thank you for understanding.

You want him to pass. Well, I want him to pass, too. This is his second year of basic algebra and he should have been in geometry.

Mrs. Parker, Karr has a 23% as of today and even if he passes his final exam next week, he won't have a passing grade for the year.

That's right, even if he scores a 100%. I have to give it to you, Mrs. Parker, your optimism is inspiring.

Extra credit? Well, Mrs. Parker, I usually assign that to students who are on the cusp of getting a B or an A and they just need a little booster.

Well, of course everyone deserves an opportunity, I don't deny that. The problem is that extra credit involves a project that demonstrates their understanding of what I've been teaching them all year. Karr has not shown that understanding.

(sigh) Look, this is high school, not elementary. I don't give word searches at this stage, and we're talking basic algebra here. 

How basic? Mrs. Parker, I spent the first two weeks reviewing order of operations and several of the kids, Karr included, couldn't even multiply without a times table in front of them.

Mrs. Parker, there were several opportunities for him to get tutoring and attend summer school, none of which were taken advantage of for his whole time in this district, which would be seven years.

I like my summers, too, and I am about to embark on mine. That said, I do offer tutoring during the month of June, as do other teachers trying to make an extra buck or two.

(sigh) Mrs. Parker, I worry about Karr graduating on time, which would be in two years. Now, how is he doing in his other classes, if I may ask?

He's doing about the same? 

Mrs. Parker, I will confess to you that I was held back in kindergarten, back in the days when the system believed in that. 

If you want to say I flunked, fine. My point is, that extra year of skills reinforcement helped me to grasp new concepts later as they came. Otherwise I might have struggled as Karr has obviously been.

No, it's not a bad mark on his record if he's held back. If the system held more kids back when needed instead of pushing them through, we'd have more genuine graduates with genuine diplomas as opposed to 12th grade exit certificates...which don't even buy a free Big Mac..

All right, Mrs. Parker, you can talk to the principal if you like, but he won't give him a fake pass on this class, either. He'll just push him up like the district tells him to.

Same to you, Mrs. Parker. Bye now.

Can anyone relate to the teacher? Maybe the parent?

Dads

    Well, today I celebrate my 15th true Father's Day....16 if you include the one just a month and a half before we were introduced to Natalie. Nobody ever really counts that one, but the excitement was there. I couldn't wait to meet her!

   So what has fatherhood been like?

   Hell? Sure!

   Heaven? Absolutely!

   There are times when it has been both simultaneously.

   The bad times were usually a direct result of how I was doing with myself. I'm not one who fakes it well. If I'm doing badly with myself, I'm not projecting a convinving mirage to others, especially my own family.

   I look at some of the best TV dads (or at least the ones who TV Guide rated as the best)...some I agree with, others not.

   The one I wished I could be like was Ward Cleaver. That guy had it all: stories of when he was a boy, sound advice, and a pretty good temperament even when he was pissed off...which was often with Beaver, not so often with Wally.

   Jim Anderson was kind of up there with Ward, but way too well scripted for any real dad...you could almost see Robert Young's desire for a few drinks behind that gentle smile.

   Mike Brady was kind of another too-well-scripted dad, never really lost his cool.

   To me, Al Bundy was more well rounded. So was Howard Cunningham. 

   Cliff Huxtable, despite his faults, was also just a bit too perfect for me. And the later scandals involving Cosby explained that facade nicely...or darkly.

   If you want to go frontier, there's always Charles Ingalls or John Walton. 

   So what makes a good dad? 

   Quite frankly, it's about being there emotionally and physically, plus and letting things come naturally. I think it's important to have both, because if one is lacking, there will be a missing element. 

   On one of my favorite shows The Edge of Night, the Whitney's manservant Gunther Wagner seemed to just naturally know how to get along with Raven Whitney's recently returned boy. When Raven's husband Sky asked what the secret was, Gunther told him it wasn't what you do, it's how you do it.

   I couldn't agree more. I think back to all the times when Natalie was an infant and we played on the floor, or when she was a bit older and we played horsey...or even when she climbed into my lap and fell asleep. Or all the times we rode in the car to school. Most of our car chats were good, some of them were not so good. But the not so good chats led to better ones later. 

   There was a time a couple of years ago when our relationship wasn't as good as it should have been. It wasn't until some sessions on a shrink's couch and me watching Inside Out 2 that I understood that my bad times were really affecting her, so I made damn sure I was going to do better.

   Sometimes I think of all those baby daddies who never get a chance to meet their kids, either by their fault or mom's fault. As a teacher, I can see usually who has had the benefit of having moms and dads on board with their upbringing. It makes the teaching a ton easier.

   Maybe it's nerdy me, or maybe it's just coming into the marriage/family era of life a bit later (my 30s), but I cannot picture making a child and not wanting to be part of its life in a personal one on one way. I kinow there are a ton of guys out there who are merely seed planters, and I wish they'd plant trees or tomatoes, but not their own seed, because in many cases they have helped spawn unbalanced kids...not always, but in many cases.

   I'm proud to be a dad and I will feel that way right up until my last breath.

   I love you, Natalie!

Fletch Revisited

 Recently, I was rereading one of my favorite novels, the 1974 mystery Fletch...that's right, the one that inspired the 1985 movie with Chevy Chase...although I have long felt the role was miscast. I actually bought this copy at the Weis Market in Wyomissing back in 1985, it even has Chevy Chase on the front with a wallet full of fake IDs.

As with most source material, there are subtle and not so subtle differences with the movie adaptation, such as names and events, though the overall plot is the same.

What many people DON'T know is that there were 9 Fletch novels written, with some sequel books featuring his son published in the 90s. The author Gregory McDonald was an inspiration to me when it came to writing dialogue.

So the question is, who is Irwin Maurice Fletcher, known to most as Fletch...as a character?

Aside from being a regular wiseass...

He fought in the marines and earned a Bronze Star in his younger days...which he refuses to collect, even when threatened with unemployment.

He loves the idea of marriage and is in fact married twice, both ending with divorce through infidelity (wife 1) and throwing a cat out the window (wife 2). He later comments to his son that with a marriage also comes two attorneys and beds aren't made that big. He maintains a civil, even friendly to the exes he owes alimony to (never pays), and his exes still adore him.

As a reporter, he believes in the stories he writes and does a thorough job. However, many of his pieces have made him subject to anger and even possible libel due to the hack editing job done by an incompetent editor who earned her job by sleeping with the boss.

Aside from that, Fletch will do ANYTHING for a story, some things which would make a self-pious soul cringe...for example sleeping with a female teen drug addict who needed a place to shack. When she dies from an overdose, Fletch is horrified and more determined to break his story about drugs on the beach, which he does over the head of the incompetent editor. Earlier in his career he also broke a story about an embezzling IRS head by bedding the man's wife and convincing her to get a divorce so she can be free to testify. She leaves the country to wait for him but Fletch only wants the story.

As I said, a lot of moral ambiguity in Fletch, but no more than elected officials in D.C. In fact, he has a strong sense of honor.

A rich man named Stanwyk sees Fletch on the beach and assumes he is a drifter, and asks Fletch to kill him for $50,000 so that he won't suffer from the pain of bone cancer. After a long subtle investigation of Stanwyk, which involves a one-time affair with Stanwyk's wife, Fletch pieces together that Stanwyk wants out of rich society (though with $3 million embezzled) so that he can be with his childhood sweetheart. This plan involves bleaching his hair to look like Fletch, murder and then burn Fletch's body, and escape to Rio with his true love....Stanwyk's moral reasoning being that he has the right to kill anyone who has agreed to kill him.

Fletch is about to do the right thing and walk away...that is until the chief of police (who Fletch had named as the source of drugs on the beach) kills Stanwyk thinking it is Fletch.

This is where Fletch's second life takes effect.

The following morning, he is due in two courtooms for contempt of court regarding alimony, as well as the Marine commandant's office to pick up his Bronze Star. Instead, he takes the money and goes to Rio, where he spends some time learning just how life should be lived...with quality as opposed to quantity.

He later befriends an Italian retired count and helps him learn who stole his vast art collection...by getting engaged to the count's daughter and faking the count's kidnapping and death to draw out the thief who is the daughter. Along the way, he himself is framed for murder by the daughter's accomplice, works with and against a wily Irish detective to get him off the hook, and even returns to reporting at a Boston newspaper for one night as a favor to an old boss.

Occasionally, Fletch's ego blinds him, and he learns that he is not as clever as he thought.

In one book, Fletch is fired for quoting a dead man as being alive (which is revealed later to be the case).

In investigating Stanwyk, he doesn't know that his wife took his picture to find out who he really was.

When trying to solve the murder for which he is accused, he logically lays out his theory to the Irish detective about his landlord's lesbian ex wife, not knowing the detective already had warrants ready to arrest the count's daughter's accomplice in the art theft.

In casting for the movies, I probably would have chosen someone younger than Chase, but that's me.

Overall, Fletch is one of the most engaging literary characters I have ever had the pleasure of reading and rereading.

An Honest Political Aside

 I had a thought. What if something happens to Trump? I am SURE many have been hoping something would happen, that something would have happened last year in his legal proceedings to prevent him from becoming President again.

It didn't happen. In case you may have forgotten, he was running the GOP actively since early 2021, his face and words plastered across online and on-air outlets to make sure we did not forget his existence.

Let's face it: he was going to get back in no matter what, the machinery had locked it in place whether it was Biden or Harris. Harris tried her damnedest in those 4 months but fell short in a lot of areas. Those courtoom scenes and his Hannibal Lecter tangents actually increased his appeal somewhat. He called those little moments "The Weave" even though most of us with a working brain saw he was doing it BECAUSE HE KNEW HE WAS GOING TO WIN, SO WHY NOT FUCK WITH PEOPLE'S HEADS?

ALL THAT SAID...back to the starting question, the big what if?

I have a confession to make: I really have to hand it to Trump because he has created this power of personality cult in a way that nobody can come close and probably will never come close to creating. Not even the biggest social media influencers will have that charisma. Granted, his charisma has attracted the praise and loyalty of white supremacists and other extreme right-wing pockets of American society, but hey, they do cast their ballots

The power is DIABOLICAL to be sure, but it's there nonetheless, and you can whine about his not using his influence for the good of America and humanity in general...because he doesn't care about any of that, he cares about him...and when he goes, there is no more Trump.

And that's my point: if he goes, it's over. Do you think the weasels that we see stand behind Trump during Oval Office media events will be able to prop up JD Vance? No, he has the image and charisma of a grapefruit rind. There might be a movement to put Donald Jr in (or here's a horrifying thought: ERIC!) but neither "heir to the throne" is their dad and NONE of those possibilities would look good on the world stage, not that we're looking too hot right now.

If you look back 24 years ago, when W came in, he had not a friend in Washington, so in came daddy's war/oil buddies to prop him up. I almost felt bad for him at times...almost. Those same war/oil buddies are the same ilk that did a ton of profiteering off of Reagan and are the EXACT SAME TYPES that stand by Trump in the Oval Office, because they are looking good next to him and are likely lining their own pockets as I write this.

If Trump goes, they'll scramble to tell Vance or other heir apparent to maintain the status quo...and then we'll see likely the biggest crash of country one could imagine.

OK...I do believe in equal time...

On the flip side, The Dems aren't doing so hot, either and despite their complaints and all, I do not see anyone rising successfully out of the 2024 ashes as of now. Lots of protesting for sure, but no solid superman or superwoman or Capra-esque caricature is making grand orations to combat the Trump force. It's still a time of wound-licking, and having been in that place personally before, it's pitiful and nobody wants to be around it.

No American who is worrying about the coming future of higher costs and economic recession/depression wants to hear self-pity either. They want a leader who can take them out of whatever hell they feel they are living in, real or imagined.

The Church Life

 "The church is not merely a thermometer that recorded the ideas and principles of popular opinion; it was the thermostat that transformed the mores of society,"-Martin Luther King, Jr.

   I guess one can take that in the positive or the negative. Personally, I do not think it should be one or the other, for I take church in a way that I suppose does not fit in with many people’s perceptions. When I think of church, I think of a place where I can learn more about God’s word, or rather what people have recorded God’s word to be...and yes I do know there is an ocean of difference when it comes to people's ideas. 

   It’s been a while since I entered a church of my own volition. Recently, my daughter asked if I would be willing to attend a local church with her and I said yes, but inside I had some reservations. This is because in my time in Las Vegas, I have attended a total of 2 churches. One was a large facility called Central Christian (that name alone has always bothered me) that I have attended with my in-laws on special occasions. 

   The other was a Mormon church that I attended for a regular service (with a work friend) and a baptism (again work friend-related). The regular service was interesting only in that it was pretty much like any other Christian church I have been to, except there was no offering. In other words, there was no evidence of the polygamy that the LDS culture has been depicted in the media. I know there are “colonies” where that happens but I don’t care to know any more about that than need be.

   This place where I am finding myself drawn to on a weekly basis now isn’t in what I’d consider to be a traditional church building of brick and stone...more like an office building. But the welcoming of any newcomer is felt, almost an exaggerated exuberance if I did not know better. But the pastor is active, loud, and engaging. No way I could fall asleep in that room with his energy!

   All that said, I still have my doubts. There is a strange history of churches I am quite familiar with that does not resonate well with me and never has. Yes, the church, no matter what church it is, wants more in terms of pew-filling, as well as funds to build or fix something or other, along with community service and outreach. I get both of those factors, people and money. 

   What I do not get or approve of is the social pressure and occasional outcasting. Almost every church I have attended has their resident “church lady”, and if you watched Saturday Night Live during the Dana Carvey era, you know who I mean. It is a judgment that is SUPPOSED to be left to the Man upstairs, but instead is taken upon those who feel they KNOW what is right and wrong all by themselves, from what is worn at church to someone’s gossip about who they saw with someone and where they were, to something so petty as how much pepper was put in the pot on soup night in the fellowship hall.

    Then there is the sense of power some churches get. I know I will likely get flak (if anyone actually reads all this, which is rare) for saying this, but the history of sexual abuse in the Catholic Church is disturbing. When a priest has been discovered to be fooling around with an innocent minor and then threatening said minor to stay quiet, said priest is often merely sent somewhere far away where they can begin their dastardly actions once more. Catch the movie Spotlight sometime, it sheds light on this practice.

   I have some vague memories of going to Sunday school at Hain Church in Wernersville when I was little, but I really did not go regularly to church again until I was 16. I don’t remember what it was, but I felt some urge to get to know God. I was always told we were a Christian family but I didn’t see it except on Christmas and even then the connection was vague. Not sure where to go, I got a lead on a church very close by that many people I knew went to, including a girl I really liked at the time (coincidence? You decide!). So I began attending, and also began attending confirmation class once a week. Later on I also got involved in the youth choir. It was a good two years where I got a better sense of Jesus.

   I also attended a church somewhat regularly when I went to school in West Virginia and also later on at Sonoma State, both leaving me feel more than a bit unfulfilled...but then at that point of life I was feeling unfulfilled in a lot of ways.

   I tried church a couple of times in Las Vegas at Central in my early days here before I met Vickie and then again at the same place when her family began attending. I had nothing against that church in itself, though I sometimes felt I was attending a variety show instead of connecting with God. Later on I got wind of some hierarchical doings and opinions there that once more soured me on the church experience.

   And here I am again, this time on my daughter’s lead, attending church. I went without her today, as she wanted to sleep in. As I said, I like the pastor and his speaking charisma. However, I hear much urging to become a member and immerse myself as a total Christian.

   I am not ready for either.

   The past year and some change has been a time of straightening myself out on several fronts. I’m still straightening myself out and probably will until I’m buried or burned, whichever ends up being cheapest.

   There have been many times when I felt God’s presence in my life and other times I did not. He has a huge world to tend to, I am just one of his black sheep in that world, wanting redemption but not sure how to go about it. Until then I will keep listening, and if this church continues to appear positive, I will listen to Pastor Nathan more and see if I fit in anywhere in that place.

Highway Centennial part 1

 I'll bet none of you can imagine what is turning 100 next year. No, not Abe Vigoda, I think he left us some time ago. I am talking about the original "interstate" highway system in America.

(insert Ogre yelling NERD!!!) Yeah I know, I'm not changing my stripes anytime soon.

That aside, this system of highways is still among us. I can name at least one U.S. highway in pretty much any place I have lived. In Berks County, U.S. 22, 222, and 422; In Detroit metro, U.S. 12 and 24; in Wilmington N.C., U.S. 17, 74, 76, 421, and 117; in Sonoma County,CA, U.S. 101; and in good ol Las Vegas, we have U.S. 93 and 95!

And in that system, we have some classics, most notably U.S. 66. It is not formally with us anymore, but we road enthisiasts know where to find it when we need it and want it.

Now, I have a particular fondness for this old system, which has seen many changes over time, had old numbers (like 66) retired, or certain road stretches renumbered. The system deserves a celebration.

With all that said, I must take a little side trip to the more modern interstate system, the one that is red, white, and blue in its shielding deisgn and created by President Eisenhower in 1956. The original design of that system has also undergone changes and expansions...and it keeps expanding!

I have to wonder why. I can see where cases of congestion on 2-lane highways might demand a freeway bypass in some places, but I am seeing expansions where none are really necessary, North Carolina in particular. That state has been trying to create I 73, an eastern leg of I 74, and a southern leg of I 87 that will never connect to its New York parent. Unfortunately (or fortunately, depending on how you view it), I 73 will likely stay in NC due to Virginia having no desire to build it on their turf. Perhaps it will just go to Myrtle Beach if South Carolina gets funding.

That's ok, though, there are eastern and western legs of I 76, 84, and 86. But it does go to show that there are periods where some states go freeway crazy. Illinois has probably the most even though one or two seem unnecessary when you look back. Texas is getting into it now with I 2 and 14.

To me, the dumbest Interstate was 99 in Pennsylvania, an obvious case of freeway building just to leave a personal legacy for better or worse.

The reason I bring up the newer system is that I wonder why it is necessary to expand on that one when the older system still gets freeway upgrades here and there. For instance, U.S. 220 could have been upgraded instead of 99 being created.

At any rate, I will be visiting some of these old classics here and there in the next year and a half...or longer, and see what each one brings to the national culture.